This is another of my poems written to be performed at Slam poetry competitions. You'll just have to imagine the actions.

I Wanna Be a Rock Star

I wanna be a rock star.
Who cares if I can’t sing.
It isn’t what you sound like.
It’s the image that’s the thing.

I can do the twitch like Jagger.
Nah - he’s just an aging rocker.
I can’t do Robbie Williams but
I can do Jarvis Cocker.

I wanna be a rock star.
I know at least five chords.
I’m sure that’s all that’s needed
For playing 'My Sweet Lord'.

I don’t like rap, I think it’s…
But I quite like Ali G.
Do you fink da ‘at an’ shell sui’ Woul’ look wicked, man, on me?

I wanna be a rock star
And strut my stuff on telly.
Have spiky orange hair and get
A ring stuck through my belly.

If I could get myself onto
That show on ITV
I’m sure if I look weird enough
Then folks would vote for me.

The trouble is they’re only kids.
If I did that I’ll bet
The public would just laugh at me.
'Nul Point', that’s what I’d get.

I’ll stick to being a poet
And doing gigs in Berkshire.
Or maybe be an author
Like my hero, Jeffery Archer.


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